Life as a traveling, working mother..

Just alittle update on the girls and I. Many ask me how my drive to work everyday is going. My answer to them is that I love it. I have an hour and a half to sing, cry, laugh, think, talk on the phone and just get lost in the beauty of the creations, all by myself. No one screaming at me wanting to talk on the phone. No one crying in the background. No one asking me what's wrong. Just me! Oh and the many state troopers on the side of the road.

Yesteday, I got a ticket for speeding. Surprise! I was coming down a hill in Blount Springs when I saw the trooper car. Looked down and was going over 80, lets just say. I automatically pulled over and waited a good minute on the man... You know I respect cops and troopers because they keep my family and others safe, but I often wonder if some of them are just flat out stupid. I mean some of the questions he asked were "duh" questions. Like "do you know why I pulled you over?" "DUH, speeding!" Not only that but it takes 30 mins to write up a ticket. Come on! Put my name on a piece of paper and lets go!

So, on to the updates on the girls. They are doing great. Very cute, but mean. The cute comes from me, the mean would be there daddy! LOL! Ok so yes they are clones of me

McKinley- I will register here for Pre-K next month. I cant believe that she will be four this summer! She's about to be in school. Wow! Time flies, but I'm excited. This is what I've been waiting for. All the new adventures! Miss the quietness of babies, but love the independent part of kids!

Amberly- She will be 3 this year and it seems as though yesterday she weighed 4 lbs and in the NICU. Kayla and I were talking the other day and the time has flown by so fast that I can't remember her being little and at home. I remember the hospital, bringing her home, and that Christmas, but that's it. Time really does fly!

We are all great! Happy, staying busy and enjoying life. We truly can't be blessed more than we are now, however, I feel God has more instore for us! Can't wait!

Take it from me......

Don't hide your emotions.... As humans, we are prideful so therefore we do not want someone to know that they hurt us. Well, don't not put on a smile when you feel like crying. Don't laugh when you want to scream. Do what you feel. You will be better off in the end.....

Teen Retreat 2008

This past weekend, I had the oppertunity to lead worship at the Teen Retreat. I've been to this event many times, but never had the experience that I had this year. I'm gonna give you play by play. Some are actually quite funny:

Friday, Feb. 1st-

1:30pm- I met the worship team at the church to leave and head to Tishomingo, Ms early. Bobby (Bob Bob) as I like to call him, well didn't quite make the 1:30 deadline. I believe it was something like this: " Steak-Out was a bas idea" or/and the favorite of mine: " I got stuck behind this old guy who wanted to do like 3 mph and then got stuck behind the train"...... Needless to say, we left alittle late.

2:00pm- We get on the road. Rachel and I rode in my car. I drove naturally and thought I knew the way to Tishomingo State Park.........


3:30pm- Realized that I missed my turn and ended in Corinth, Ms....... Took almost 30mins to turn around in this small town.. Yes that's right! Everybody and their mommas were out in town.....

4:45pm- Rachel and I made it finally after some long disputes on whether we actually went 11 miles past the sign which read "Tishomingo State Parks 11 miles". Yeah well they were wrong! It's more like 15 miles!! In the meantime, I decided to pull over and ask a lady that worked at this convience store, how many more miles it was...... Lady: A very homely looking lady with no make up, an outdated hair cut and surrounded by men with no teeth. Conclusion: I don't fit in here! O and I'm still wondering where they get their hair cut......

5:30pm- We have already set up and had practice. Decide we are going to go eat at this little mom and pop restraunt...... Note: Read the analogy about the above woman and put in to play here....

7:30pm- Yes that's right! It took 2 hours to get food. Of course Bob Bob had to have the "inside meat" of the pork.

8:00pm- We've made it to worship and Bro. Walter (very attractive.. Sorry! Had to put it there) did an outstanding job and God started to touch hearts....

11:00pm- Forced to go to bed! Crazy!


Saturday, Feb. 2nd-

7:30am- Breakfast..... Is this the dirty peepants story or was that at lunch?


9:00am- Worship and Service- Praise God for sending such a Godly man to us. Conclusion: There is a war with in us..... A war between us and the world, the devil, and our flesh.... Solution: Jesus Christ!

10:00 am- Games: Here came the "Are you smarter than your Youth Pastor?" Well, lets just say it was kinda messy!

12:30pm- Lunch: Some very tasty food I might add.... Oh yes and the dirty peepants story thanks to David.

7:00pm- I skipped the hike..... This was Worship service and Praise God yet again. Worship went awesome and God really took it where he wanted it... Brother Walter preached and we had some Dramas.... Conclusion: One came to know Christ and many more were dealt with, even myself.

Well lets say about 10:30pm most of everybody left to go home. And that was about it..... God moved in that place and I thank God for that..

O wait! Sunday, Feb. 3rd, 2008- The vans get lost. Went to Tupelo, Ms and realized they were nowhere near Decatur, AL! Conclusion: Turn left instead of right onto Natez Trace.

No in all seriousness, I hated that it ended. We had a great time and I just hate to leave that little bubble but we all must. Continue to pray for all of us that we might seek our Lord better. It's time we take a stand. To all of you, I hope and pray you have a relationship with Christ. If not, now is the time. He loves you and is calling you. It's not gonna be easy, but at least you know that you know that you know.... God bless!


Note: Stay tune for pictures!!

Clarifications

Ok so I realize that most of you reading the last post have no clue as to what I am talking about, so he I am to clarify somethings.

My ex husband and I seperated in Nov. of 2006. I filed divorce papers. I was completely done with the marriage. I started dating a man who I had known for awhile prior. I know what many of you are thinking....... I was still married, right? Yes I was but only on paper I felt. This whole relationship was suppose to be casual fun, however, it took a different route. It lasted a year.

To make the story better: We work together, so there is your understanding of how difficult it is to see him move on. The break up has been alittle tough and rough around the edges, but we are getting there.

Note: It was a wonderful 1/2 relationship.... Not a full relationship bc of a few things.... Distance, work (shh... secret!), family, oh and the age thing..... I know what you are thinking. How can that be a wonderful relationship? Well, it was just nice to be wanted by someone, ok? Well we finally ended it in September, however, that hasn't worked well either. Now it is finally over, because there is no point anymore! I'm not bitter, nor hurt. Let's get that straight. I'm fine other than being lonely. As you can read in the last post, he has moved on and I haven't. Why? I don't have a clue. My emotional side says I "need" someone, but logic tells me otherwise.......

There's the scoop! Now you know.....

Ok I'll fess up!!

I'm gonna admit it! I'm alone! I feel alone! Sometimes alittle more alone than I would like to be. What do I do? NOTHING!! You'd think with two kids and a full time job that I wouldn't feel alone, well you are WRONG!! This isn't really meant for you to feel sorry for me, but it's just what is on my mind at the moment.

I had lunch today with the "wonderful" (a little sarcasm for those who love it) ex-boyfriend and I have to say that it went well. It was much different than dinners we use to have, of course. Apart of me is happy for him that he has moved on and that our break up doesn't bother him, however, majority of me wants to cry. I'm not upset anymore at the fact that we are over, but at the fact that I feel lonely. He doesn't, now and me being the woman that I am, is a little jealious. Not of her, because he will have issues with her too I imagine, but of him. I'm jealious that I can't have "someone" (not that I need anyone) to take my mind off things, or to fill some of the void of having absolutely no one.

Maybe I'm just rambling on but this is whats in my head and it's been in there for a few days now and I had to let it out! YAY! Ok I'm done......

Updates......

Ok well there isn't much to update, but I will give you something to read...

Our New Year has begun with some rocky starts......

I have decided to not move to the Birmingham area because, frankly, I'm scare out of my mind! LOL! I don't want to be down here by myself with two kids if something ever was to happen. Currently, I'm driving everyday back and forth.... NO! It's not as bad as everyone makes it out to be. In fact I kinda enjoy that time to myself. I am ,however, gonna let the Lord lead my path. If he wants me to take a different path, then he will come through for me. That's all I really have to say about that.

McKinley started her horse riding lessons and from what I hear, she is doing better than most adults in the group. That's my girl!!

Amberly, well, she is being Amberly. She is the child that I always said I was NEVER gonna have..... LOL! "Never say Never", Right? No, she's hilarious, but very daring. She really loves getting her way thanks to acouple of people in our lives.... Not gonna mention any names here.

I am truly blessed beyond words! Hope all of you are having a fantastic 2008 so far. May God bless you and keep you!

It's Official!

I'm have entered into the statistics of divorcees... Yep, today was the day. I know that it was the right decision for me so I am very happy about it. I can't say that I am at all happy that the marriage failed, but I'm happy that my life will go on and that someone out there will love me the way I deserve!