Is HE the ONE?

This was sent to me via email by my best friend.. Thought it had some good points so I posted it!


Is HE the ONE?"THE RIGHT ONE"First we must allow our Heavenly Father to do the picking. And second,the decision for a mate must be made on a spiritual and intellectualbasis before it's made on an emotional one."What about love? Shouldn't that be the third? you ask. No, and I'lltell you why. "The heart is deceitful above all things and beyond cure.Who can understand it? (Jeremiah 17:9).The heart is willful and is driven by its own agenda. It does notconsider things rationally and intelligently it just loves to love!Therefore you have to point it in the right direction: "Above all else,guard your heart, for it is the well spring of life" (Proverbs 4:23)!Whenever you meet a man, you need to get clearance from God, check outhis attributes, and then allow your heart to engage.Dating exists not for mating; it exists for collecting data. I believethat the biblical design would be friendship, courtship and thenmarriage.Friendship is two people walking together in agreement andaccountability, learning and growing together.Courtship follows the mutual agreement to commit to one anotherexclusively - it is the decisive turning toward the agreed-upon g oal ofthe marriage altar. It is a period of laying a foundation and preparingyour life together after
marriage.But dating? Well, if you do date, use the time wisely to gather thesefacts.1. Check out the fabric. Is the person mate material? Does this manhave an intimate relationship with the Father through Jesus Christ? Doeshe care what God thinks about his behavior? Is he accountable to Godas well as another co-laborer in the faith? Accountability is animportant factor.It is imperative to maintaining a committed relationship. Is yourpotential spouse a member of the same family - the family of God?You need to have common interests and values and agree on theessentials of living day to day. You have a similar spiritual walk. You eatthe same spiritual diet. You enjoy a lot of similar things. You havelike interests, like goals in life , like opinions on basic life issues.You have had like experiences in your background. Though there is sometruth to the idiom that opposites attract, like-minded folks farebetter together.Furthermore, does he want to get married? If you want to be marriedand your dreamboat isn't interested , don't waste your time.Remember, women fall in love and get married. Men decide to getmarried and then look for a wife. Note the difference in order. So if a guysays he's not looking for anything serious, take his words seriously.If he's not going in your direction, get off the bus and wait for theright one.2. Does this man want you? Is he pursuing you? The man who is rightfor you will pursue you, and God's hand in the relationship will beclear. No guessing, no fleeces, no dead ends.Scripture says: "He who finds a wife finds what is good and receivesfavor from the Lord" (Proverbs 18:22).Note -who finds whom? THE MAN FINDS THE WIFE. From the beginning oftime, God has transported men and women across the world in order to putthem together.At the RIGHT TIME, He will bring that man on the scene and he willfind you. In God's per fect design, the man is the one who recognizes hismate.Adam had no problem recognizing that Eve was his missing rib. You donot need to strategically place yourself anywhere. You don't have tohelp a guy out because he's shy!Men will do whatever they have to do to get what they truly want. Theman in your life should recognize you as the pearl of great price inhis life and be willing to do whatever he must in order to gain yourhand. If he is passive about gaining your affections, take it as a signthat he is not
interested.Many a woman's mother has suggested that it is a good idea to marry aman who loves you more than you love him. As cold as that sounds, itactually might be scriptural if you stop to think about it: "We lovehim because he first loved u s" (1 John 4:19). Until then, take theultimate chill pill .You don't need a bunch of men in your life to make you feel all rightabout yourself.You need only one man - your man, the one God has selected to selectyou.And trust me, the right man at the wrong time can be just as awful asthe wrong man at any time. So trust God's timing in this. He is theultimate matchmaker. Rela x, sit pretty and allow yourself to be found.Again - WAIT until the man voices his intentions. He should take thelead in establishing the relationship. You may have an inkling that heis the one, but God will use the man to set the tone of therelationship. Allow him the opportunity to woo you - this is your first act ofsubmission. Jesus set the standard for all men to follow. They shouldlove us first. And they should lead the relationship.3. The man in your life should not desire to move into your house,only into your heart . A man who prepares for your future has made hisintentions clear. A man who is husband material has the means to takecare of a wife. He is a responsible human being who understands he needsto have something to offer. In short, a man should have the means tobe a suitable lover for you.4. Check out his buddies. Everyone knows birds of the same featherflock together, yet most women fail to see the connection between a manand his friends. A man's pals tell you a lot about the person that youhaven't seen yet. They reveal things about the guy's character thatmight be hidden when he is on good behavior. Everyone knows how to puthis best foot forward. Don't stay focused on the foot, check out therest of the body!5. Check out his relationship with his mother. How does he treat her?This is your preview of how he will treat you. There are lots of menwho, because of a negative relationship with their mothers, reallydon't like women, yet say they do. Unresolved issues between mother andson continue between husband and
wife.6. Remember that a man's family reveals the cloth from which he's cut.Take note and decide whether you want your future with the man in your<> life to look like his present family situation.7. Check out the patterns of his life. Do you see repeated cycles ofdrama in his personal kingdom? Broken relationships? Problems in makingcommitments --including the job market? Mood swings? Is a problemalways someone else's fault? Does he embrace responsibility or shirk it?Does he keep his promises? Is he a man of good reputation? Rememberall garments look wonderful hanging in the store, but with wear, somebegin to unravel.Give yourself time and space to check out the man in your life. Timewill always reveal whether or not he is made of the right stuff.8. Does this man have a vision for his life? Is he running with that& nbsp;vision? Remember, God decided Adam needed help once Adam got busy DOING his assignment. As we saw Adam, a man doesn't need help until he isbusy doing what he was created and called to do. Is the man in yourlife guided by sense of destiny and purpose, or does he just allow lifeto happen around him? A man who is not certain of his mission can be amost miserable person - and you'll be miserable too if you don't knowwhere YOU want to go in life.A man who has vision is not intimidated by a woman whose missionstatement is clear. He will be your best ally, cheerleader and assistantbecause he wants you both to make it! A man who cannot be supportive ofyour achievements because he is floundering in a sea of uncertaintyover his own life is not a healthy partner to have and to hold forever.Creating dependencies or feelings of obligation is not the way to getthe best out of your man. Somewhere along the way, he will resent youand flee from the smothering burden of obligation he associates youwith. You want a man who is firmly anchored in his identity in Christ.Remember, we are looking for a man who will be priest and leader of hishome. His first instinct should be to want to cover you, redeem you,and provide for
you.Your job is to decide if this is the man God has ordained for you tocomplement.9. Complimentary. Do your talents and gifts complement his? Do hisgifts, compliment yours? What about your temperaments? Do you see the twoof you as an effective team capable of bringing blessing to the livesof those around you? Do your futures mesh? Can you coordinate yourgifts in an attractive and effective way?This is why knowing your purpose is so important. Make sure yourhearts beat for mutual causes. When I go shopping I always consider thefabric, the fit and what I already have in my closet. Will my nextpurchase be a complimentary addition to what I already have? If I find thatI am going to have to buy shoes and matching accessories to go with anew outfit, I leave it right on the rack. It is too expensive aproposition. If the man you meet makes you feel that you need to completelyreinvent yourself, something is wrong.This is where I ask you to consider the relationship in terms of cost.Is this relationship expens ive spiritually, emotional or physically?Does your longing for a mate make you willing to forfeit who you arein the process? Or does he see you as the gift that you are? The manin your life should consider you a rare find, a priceless jewel-becauseof you he is getting ready to get blessed big-time! Any relationshipthat causes you to feel unworthy, unlovely, unacceptable, undesirableor that you have to work for love, is too expensive!God has called the man to cover, protect and provide not onlymaterially for a woman, but emotionally and spiritually as well. You should bericher in mind, body and spirit for your union with the man of yourdreams. The man in your life should make rich deposi ts into your heartand spirit, not withdrawals.10. Does he have a healthy love and acceptance of himself? Make surethe man in your life has taken time to heal from past relationships andhas made peace with himself. How he cares for himself is how he willcare for you. A man's relationship with God is crucial here. His lovefor himself will only be as strong as his love for God. This is notsomething that you can impart. You cannot be his savior or
teacher.That is out of spiritual order. In his rightful place as your personalpriest, he should be leading you to a richer relationship with Christ.If he is causing you to compromise your faith and destabilize yourwalk, if he is leading you into sexual sin or causing you to bedistracted from your commitm ent to God, the relationship is too expensive.Offending the Lover of your soul, who promises you eternal love, is toohigh a fare to pay for a ride that has a limited run. If you and yourman can't soar in the Spirit, when the force of your love for another istested by the pull or gravity of the world, your union will not beable to survive.So you decide. How much is your life worth? How much is your loveworth?You will be able to accept only what you believe you deserve. Godhimself calculated the worth of your love and decided it was worth Hislife. He now pledges you His love for eternity. Yes, Jesus sets theexample for all others to follow when He paid a ransom for His bride.Should you expect less from a mortal man? Throughout the Biblical age, menwere willing to pay the cost for what they truly desir ed. The truth ofthe matter is everyone knows that anything worth having, costs and noone gets a ride in this life for free.Our prayer:Dear Heavenly Father God,I confess that I have not always been as careful as I should've beenwith my heart. From time to time, my desire for love has caused me toleave my heart in the wrong hands. I now commit my heart into Yourhands for safekeeping. Please help me to stop being so impulsive with whatyou deem so precious. As I learn to celebrate Your love for me, letme learn from Your example what a bridegroom should really be like.Help me to never settle for less than what you desire for me. As Iembrace You as the Lover of my soul, keep my affections in the haven of Yourown heart. As I rest in Your love, make me more discriminating of those who approach me.I ask that You take over this area of my life. Keep me from those Youknow would hurt my heart. I invite You to set a hedge around me andkeep me from all who would draw me into unfruitful relationships untilthe day you present me to the mate that You have selected for me. Grantme the discernment to recognize him as he recognizes me. Cleanse mefrom the temptation to typecast the men I meet according to what I
see.Help me to trust in Your knowledge and lean not on my own understanding. I know that You know what is best for me; therefore I yield toYour choice. In Jesus'Name. Amen.Ladies this is something you should definitely share with a friend,whether you are single or married... It is something to think about,When you ask is "He" the one!"the most exhausting thing in life is being insincere"Wounds from a friend are better than many kisses from an enemy. Proverbs 27: 6 Value the heartfelt criticism of a true friend."When wealth is lost, nothing is lost, when health is lost, something is lost, when character is lost, ALL is lost"A woman's heart should be so hidden in Christ that a man should have to seek Him first to find her."Find a place to be quiet enough to hear what's inside you!!!